I’ve always wanted to be more successful.
Ever since I was a kid growing up poor in a wealthy neighborhood, I read every book I could find that talked about how to be more successful. And I tried everything those books told me to do. But somehow, things never quite worked out the way they said it would.
Those books often suggested that going after what you want with a full head of steam will make people “bend to your will.” Now I don’t know about you, but I have never found that to be the case.
In nearly every case where I tried that, I ended up burning bridges, alienating people, and certainly NOT getting what I wanted from the situation. And, even if I did “win” or succeed, it was only at the cost of relationships, happiness, peace of mind, and personal health — a “Pyrrhic victory”: a victory won at a staggering cost, which is really no victory at all.
I have often said that during this time in my life, I didn’t merely burn bridges. I blew them up.

The years went by. I kept reading more and more books, doing what “they” said, and trying my darndest to make the information work. But things never seemed to work out the way they said it would.
Finally, one day, I said, “I’ve had it! Maybe it’s not me. Maybe all these $#&% ‘experts’ are wrong!”
So I threw away the books and did something I’d never done before. I started being myself.
I started saying, “I don’t know” and “Can you help me?” I began to be more open, more honest, have higher integrity.
I stopped expecting people to be interested in what I was doing, and began to show a genuine interest in what THEY were doing.
And then a funny thing happened…
People started to be ATTRACTED to me. People began to actually WANT to do things for me — without my even asking or expecting them to do so. I noticed that people started feeling more comfortable around me.
But then something even MORE important began to happen…
For the first time in my life, I started to genuinely enjoy MY OWN COMPANY.
For the first time, I began to find things about me that I actually LIKED.
I began to feel CONFIDENCE — actual, true self-confidence, not the fake or puffed-up kind that I had tried to put on like an ill-fitting suit of clothes.
This had never come close to happening when I was following the advice from all those “experts” that purported to know how to succeed with people.
Then, one day, I finally realized that there was ONE SINGLE DIFFERENCE between what I was now doing, and what “they” had told me to do.
And I realized that that ONE SINGLE DIFFERENCE could be stated in a phrase consisting of just 11 letters.
It was a bright summer morning. I startled awake with the sudden realization that had eluded me all those long, painful, frustrating years. And it came to me in the form of a question:
“What is the SINGLE reason why a person or business fails?”
As soon as I asked the question, I knew the answer. And here it is:
“The single reason a person or business FAILS is FOCUS ON SELF.”
That is what I had been doing throughout all those arduous years of frustration and non-success: Focusing all of my energies on what I wanted, MY needs, MY wants, and my petty concerns.
Now, let’s be honest: we all want something.
Most of us want things like… More money, a nice house, a comfortable living, friends and family around us, peace of mind, good health, and so on.
Well, think for a moment about what most people are doing to try to fulfill those desires – e.g., get what we want.
What do most of us spend most of our lives doing? Trying to get everyone else to see things the way WE see them. In other words, trying to get others to agree with, like, or buy from us, so we can get what we want.
Right?
Now, doesn’t it make sense that the only important question is: Does doing this WORK?
In other words: Does this method get most of us what we want?
In most cases, I think you’d agree that the answer is a thudding, “Ah, no.”
Let me pause for a moment to relate something that one of my mentors once brought to my attention:
People who are 100 times more successful than you are, are NOT 100 times smarter than you. That’s not humanly possible.
Similarly, people who are 100 times more successful than you, don’t work 100 times HARDER or 100 times LONGER you do. That’s not possible either.
They aren’t 100 times more EDUCATED; nor, in the vast majority of cases, did they start with 100 times more MONEY than you had when you started.
Therefore, if the single major difference in success is NOT dependent upon those things to which we usually ascribe success, what IS it dependent upon?
The answer: A change in results can only be dependent upon one thing: A change in STRATEGY. (Read: doing something differently than you’re doing right now.)
And – and this is really important – a change in STRATEGY (doing something differently) can only happen because of a change in PERSPECTIVE (that is, you suddenly seeing your situation differently).
That simply means, we human beings cannot and WILL NOT do something differently, until and unless we SEE the situation we’re in, in a different way.
The only question, then, is: Will FOCUS ON SELF ever work?
And the answer – which we really already know in our hearts – is: No.
So, I was left with the question: “Okay, if ‘FOCUS ON SELF’ doesn’t work, then what does work?”
“If ‘FOCUS ON SELF’ is the single reason hy a person or business fails, then what’s the single reason hy a person or business SUCCEEDS?”
That answer also came to me that wonderful summer morning.
Conveniently, that answer is also 11 letters long.
And the answer that came to me was…
“The single reason why a person or business SUCCEEDS is FOCUS OF SELF.”
The difference between ”Focus ON Self” and ”Focus OF Self” is just one tiny letter. And yet, it’s all the difference in the world.
Let me explain…
Each of us has unique gifts, talents, skills, knowledge, and abilities that we’re rarely aware of, use, or appreciate.
If we happen to be one of the fortunate few who are even aware of them, we almost never realize how or that others might find our talents, skills, and abilities of extremely high value.
In short, most of us think we don’t know much, don’t have much, and can’t do much to be of much value to other people.
Is it any wonder why we “Focus ON Self”? We’re just trying to get some modicum of self-esteem here! (Plus, that’s what the ”success gurus” have been telling us will work!)
What they never told us, though, is how painful “Focus On Self” actually is.
They also don’t tell us about Focus Of Self for a number of reasons, which we’ll talk about later.
What’s my point?
You have uniquely special gifts that are just aching to be expressed.
And what’s truly sad is that YOU probably don’t realize how many other people would truly value, welcome, and appreciate receiving the gifts you have to share.
And – and this is the really cool part - that there are masses of people who will GLADLY pay money to receive the gifts you have.
The difference between happiness and unhappiness, between success and failure, between being miserable and being blissful, then, lies in these two simple phrases I’ve just given you, each just 11 letters long.
I hope this information helps you in some way today.
To your freedom,
Noah
PS. Drop me a comment below if today’s message resonated with you in any way.
Oh, and be sure to tell me if you’d like more articles like this.
PPS. By the way, be sure to join me for the Awakening to Abundance Telesummit – we had a tremendous response to this the other day, and it’s an exciting free event you can join me on, so I wanted to be sure you didn’t miss it.
Just click the link…
http://awakeningtoabundance.com/NStJohn
I believe in you!
If you enjoyed today’s article, please “Like” and comment and share if you want more content like this…

Noah St. John, Inventor of Afformations
Yep, it’s true. You can have more abundance and complete personal well-being in just 5 minutes a day. Here’s how I did it…
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I agree, more elaboration on Focus OF Self would be greatly appreciated!
Stay tuned…
As always, I enjoy so much reading your insights, this article was was awesome to say the least. Fellow Buckeye’s must stick together.
Thanks FMB, I appreciate the nice comment.
Noah, I don’t understand what you mean about Focus Of Self. I have a website that sells product of items we draw and create, it doesn’t get much traffic yet, we give things away all the time on our facebook but so far not many orders. What am I doing wrong, we are working VERY hard. How do I shift from focus on self to focus of self???? I have been using your aforemations audio (I bought the $97 program). It’s only been a month with little change but I will keep at it! Any additional guidance you can provide would be helpful. Thanks
Great question Tonja. Make sure you follow the 4 Steps of Afformations that I gave you in the Afformations Formula program.
Also, ask your customers what they would consider most valuable and see how you can provide it for them.
A simple step that most “wantrepreneurs” never do!
Good Morning Mr. Noah St. John:
Yes “FOCUS ON SELF” because it is up to ourselves to create our nitch in Society
We must love ourself, and it is contagious when that happens because that is
is what love does., It glorifies our relationships, and magnifies our purpose in life.
Which is ultimately to love and be loved , sew good things and reap our harvest.
Thanks for your comment, Angeline.
Good evening from Europe bless!
The insight of this FOCUS if SELF..which is true and yes the value of this article is spot on!!
Blessings and was the nudge for tonight’s decision I was faced with..and got me back to FOCUS of SELF.versus..being focused ON SELF..(which of course distracts..sometimes as you say!!) Being centered in oneself but shifting the center to just slighty
- focus OF SELF..
GREAT..ahaa moments occurred..
We seek far and long and so many times it is simple yet just a slight shift like you point out in this article so well.
Love your heart..and the warm feelings from the information every time I receive mail to the inbox.
Thank you very much.
Blessings.
H/A
You are most welcome, Heli. Thank you for your lovely comment.
Hi Noah,
Great article. Please would you do a follow up? I’ve been committed to the Afformations package for a couple of weeks now and I’ve noticed some very interesting changes – particularly in my confidence and relationships with others. Thank you.
Best wishes,
Andy
London, UK
You bet, Andy. What kind of results exactly are you seeing?
Hi Noah,
In brief I feel a huge boost in positive energy coupled with clarity. There were a number of issues I had been playing mental judo (!) with for months and causing me some worry. You know the phrase – ‘You can’t see the wood for the trees!’ But I’ve found using Afformations and Audio have really helped start to shift the negative thought patterns and brain ‘booby traps’ – and allowed me to make some key decisions on these issues.I am implementing these to good effect already.
More to follow.
Many thanks,
Best wishes,
Andy
Extraordinarily interesting blog entry …
Eagerly awaiting the next installment !
Awesome Christin, thanks for the comment!
Thanks for the reminder.
You bet, Janice.
Noah,
Thanks for reminding me that by helping others we also help ourselves.